OcD, much.

Sorry!!! lol. I haven't posted in a while. ...actually, I don't think anyone reads this. lol :(
Maybe it just keeps me sane. But, I don't know...

Let's see: I let off right before I went on the summer trip with my friends from school. So, the trip was fun. (I'm not going into any more details other then this because I getting tired of telling it) I will mention, that I told a friend that I've thought of suicide on the trip and he ended up telling the teacher and I had a very long talk with him. And a very uncomfortable one, at that. lol.

The trip ended August 3rd. When I came back, I felt changed...in a way. I felt more self-confident, which is always a struggle for me. I also felt confident about my personality and who I was. ...After a while, the effects of the trip wore off. Now, I need to find...myself, again.

A couple days ago, while at school, I kinda got really really mad at a friend for stealing my backpack. Which wasn't the right thing to do. And I know that now. I apologized afterwards and he forgave me. Which I'm grateful for. Things like that, the things I do, I get so mad at myself. i just wish I wouldn't have done that. But I'm also grateful that I did because if I didn't I wouldn't have thought so much, and tried to change that part of myself.

One of my friends is fed up of me. Apparently, I'm annoying. Just, because I trusted him with every thought of mine. And he's annoyed with my thoughts. Because of him, I think I have OcD, or at least that's what he called it, what I have. Honestly, I think I'm starting to believe him. Every single day, I find something new to obsess. I'm a disaster. I know it doesn't sound all that bad...but honestly, I'm pretty bad.

One of my goals for this year is to get straight As. But honestly, I don't think that all achieve it. Because, I think to let things soak before I actually get started. It's not that I don't do it. It's just that it doesn't appeal to me. So, I wait a while before doing it.

This year, I'm gonna wear make-up. Well, at least try to. I don't even know how to apply it right...whatever. Tomorrow, I'm gonna try.

I want to change my clothes style so badly! But everyone will probaly think it's weird that I just change during the school year. If I were them, I probaly would think it's weird, also.

Gabby is officially my new hairstylist. lol. Well, at least, hair-trimmer person. lol.

So far this year, I feel like a cat in heat. Because I have changed the person I like between four different people and the past week and a half.

In 9th grade, I think I'm gonna change my name to Kat. Instead of Katheryn, because...I don't know, I feel like I want a change. A big one.

I'm ready for high school, but at the same time, I'm not. I'm ready for the big changes. but not ready for making new friends.

I put Marianne on my dislike list. But not really. I said that out loud. But now I kinda regret it. Because I know she will probaly hear about it. And start a nasty rumor about me.

I recently got a psychology magazine. And I think I've decided to be a psychology major in college. But I'm not sure, yet.

I want to get some modeling magazines.

I think I'm good at nothing. Nothing really makes me different from eveyone else. I feel like nothing. But I'm going to continue on. Because I have to.

I've tried drawing. I like...no talent. Oh, that's another thing. I don't have any talents. Lucky me.

Hair Cut

Btw yesterday I got a hair cut with many cute layers. Today I found out that my mom left her cell phone at the hair salon. lol She is so funny sometimes! :) lol

Mall

Well. Um...that was fun. lol So, Marianne, Zaire, Angelina, Nina, Kelsey, Julia, and myself all went ot the mall today. We were there for about....six hours. lol It was awesome. Julia and me and Zaire all tried on dresses for like the first hour and half....and I FOUND THE CUTEST DRESS EVER!!!!! but I couldn't get it because unfortunately my dad didn't want to answer his cell!!!! I'm so mad at him... Then we went shopping for like...ever and afterwards, we got the largest amount of food ever. lol and ate for 2 whole hours!!! Candy was next! Julia got everything sour and...I stole a fruit roll up lol it was so good and sour, in front of the security gaurd. For the rest of the time, we tried on dresses and ditched each other and played hide and seek and took pictures on the baby toys. Lol I sat on the ambulance and bus and motorcycle. lol It was so much fun. Next time we should get a bunch of people and assign everyone into pairs with at least one cell phone and play a giant game of hide and seek!!! lol :)

Being Confused

Will is confused on who he likes....again. Now it's between three people. And I'm pretty positive he likes Brenna in the way that people will always like someone...no matter what. I have a person like that...but I'm not telling who! lol I'm teasing you peoples.

Blah!

I went to girl scout camp this weekend...and the whole time everyone was using my cell for texting because I was the only one who had service! And...and then Trish got mad at Rachel and I for not doing what we were supposed to do...and actually we were working the hardest!!!

So, I have been texting this guy named....something mexican lol I don't know how to spell it. He goes to my school but I've never met him...and he has taken a liking to me apparently even though we've never met each other before. He then said, while on the camping trip, that he wanted to try out saying something and that something was...I love you. And I don't necessarily like the dude because I don't know how he acts around other people..and I'm afraid.

Jon still likes me...and I have no idea what I'm going to do about that. And he's not going on the summer trip...thank God.

Will is going on the summer trip and I am making baked goods for the meeting at Carisse's house tomorrow to prove to him that I can bake. He's starting to get fed up of me...but I changed that...well sort of. He's also starting to tell me a lot more...like about other 8th graders. And I have no idea what has changed him...but...never mind him telling me things and changing is upsetting me...because that means somethings happened and.... Yeah, I'm just a freak!

I think this is it....

Actually it's not. My friend Rachel was going out with a guy named Stephen and they recently broke up because he was cheating on her. Rachel, Gabby, and I met him at a park the other weekend and afterwards he told all three of us that he likes Gabby and I. he also said that he doesn't want to go out with rachel anymore. rachel and Stephen were messaging on myspace that night and made an arrangement to be friends with benefits...Stephen was also texting me at the time and asked me to go to the park with him...alone. I didn't go and he probaly doesn't like me anymore because of it and I don't care. Apparently, Rachel and him aren't friends with benefits anymore but I don't believe it and I'm pissed at her for being in that arrangement.

I might go over to Rachel's house tomorrow to go to the park and meet...the mexican dude lol I can't spell his name. But I really doubt I will go over to her place because I won't have a ride there.

Fun + Boredom....Again lol

So, I'm over at my friend's house....and we are waiting to go to the park. lol

Will has officially told me that he will only like me as a friend. :( Ah...whatever I barely even like him anymore. But it still hurts....lol not really.

So, that's it.

Not Funny

Well, my friend Rachel was texting Will and she asked if he had any feelings for me and he said that he can't see me as more than a friend. :( Rachel and Gabby are now forcing me not to like him. And I think I might like a sixth grader who is now a seventh. But apparently that's unacceptable, too. Lexi is trying to find me a guy and so are Gabby and Rachel, now.

So annoying. That's all.