omg so sorry

I haven't been able to post in a while and I feel so bad. Well, let me tell you about W. In the last week, he has told me that he was confused about liking me or not, then he said he liked me and just last night he told me that we are just friends. He is such a confusing guy. I don't get him at all. And right now, all I can think about is him, which isn't fair because he is going to high school after June 12th. And I won't be able to see him for like ever. And he isn't even really texting me or talking to me. I even made a complete fool of myself last night. Which isn't good. :( I just feel.....like a complete idiot for not noticing sooner. He either completely doesn't like me at all or he is just refusing the idea of liking me because we won't be able to see each other. BTW-to fill you in, he's an 8th grader and I'm a 7th, which means that he is graduating this year and to make it worse, we aren't going to the same high schools. And maybe my resoning is completely wrong, but I really don't know anymore.

This week we are going on a three-day trip to Pomo Canyon or the graduating ceremony. On Friday, when we get back, I am picking up my friends Gabby, Ally, and Jordan. So that we can have our usual three-day weekend party. Friday night, from 7-11 pm, all four of us are going to Cal Skate. Saturday from 10-3 pm I am having an almost 25 person party, all girls no guys invited lol. Because I am turning 13 on June 6th at 6:24 pm. From 7-11 pm again I might be going to Cal Skate lol. And Sunday, I really don't know we might go to the movies and have a rampage or go to Scandia or something like that lol. Monday, our rocketry project is due. And right after school, I am playing soccer with a few friends at A park. Tuesday, I am having a Halo Tournament with some friends over at J's house, go figure lol. ANd that doesn't end 'til 6:30 pm. Wednesday, I hink is one of the only free days I have in the next couple of weeks. The three-day party might end a little soon because Gabby and I have the stupid rocketry project. Thursday, I have Girl Scouts after school and that doesn't end 'til 5:00 pm. Friday, I don't know what I'm doing, but since it is a half day, I might be hanging out with friends and walk some place.

So, moving on, let's talk about J. Well, Saturday he decided to show up at Cal SKate when I was there. This is all thanks to Lexi because she is the one who invited him pretending to be me. And I didn't want him to come. So, the whole time he acted like a loner and I couldn't really do anything about it because I was skating with Ariel my friend's cousin. SO, then Lexi forced me to skate and be around him. Which didn't go so well, because I was pissed off at Lexi. I confronted her and she said that it would be a good idea to not like W and to force myself to like J. Which can and will not happen because I like W. I told her that and she got all mad and felt really really badly afterwards. But there was nothing I could do about it because J was already that. RIght then, J's dad called him and told him that he as on his way because J had to go home. I kinda felt relieved but then I started to cry becaue everyone was being me. Right when I started to cry J looked at me and then walked away. He didn't even say or do anything. Which kinda made me mad because if he does like me then why didn't he say anything or do anything. I absolutely don't get it. And to make it even worse my friend Tyler decided that it would be funny if J asked me out that night even though he already did, just through a text. But thank god J didn't ask me. I think that J got the hint that I didn't like him but for some reason today he acted as if he didn't care if I didn't like him and that he would like me anyways. Which kinda made me mad because I don't want him to like me. My friend Nina also wanted me to hug J today just to see his reaction because apprently everyone thinks he likes m, which he does.

Very long story, lol. But that is about everything that has happened and is going to happen in the next few weeks. lol I can't wait for summer, just to get away from the drama but then again it's going to be sad because I won't see W anymore at school.